Saturday, February 16, 2019

Growing Up

Yep, I'm back. The full time work is done for now and I am hoping to get a bit of writing back on track.

Ayden Jane is really growing up. I'm not talking about how tall she is getting, even though that is happening too. I'm talking about her conversation. About dealing with social things at school. About caring for others. Okay, parts of her are growing up. There is plenty of her that still loves princesses, and fairies, and playing with toys, and imagination. I am thrilled those parts are content to stay young a little longer.

Growing up is challenging for any kid. Most kids have fears that other kids will laugh at them. Most kids worry that they will get picked on. Some kids worry about tests and grades. A few kids glide through pretty much unscathed but I think if we are honest, that is very few.

Now, how about heading into the wild world of growing up when you are a bit, "quirky, different, unique, weird, interesting, complicated, ...." just pick a word. These are the words that make fascinating and successful adults, but targets in school.

Over the years Ayden Jane has had her share of being made fun of. If that makes you gasp, breathe and think about it. SOME kids are just not nice. Some kids do not understand that all people are valuable. Some kids do not like others who are not the same as they are. She's had a bit of a resurgence of being on the receiving end of unkind words. We had a long chat about the stuff that is said and goes on in school. In the end though, here is what she had to say about it all:

1 - don't worry Mom. I know what he/they say is not true. God made me awesome.

2 - he/they are just mean. I think maybe they had a rough life but I'm not letting them take that out on me any more.

3 - if he/they were ever really, really, mean, C would punch them in the face. (I did NOT encourage this one. don't worry)

So there ya go. Confident, compassionate, protected. I'll take it. I mean, to hear negative things about yourself from your peers at age 11 and truly know and believe that those things are not true? To not lash out but to have at least some compassion for them?

Working on knowing when to ignore and when to speak out. - things like don't touch my desk or stay away from me. Although not nice, those you can just ignore. Calling you names, using bad language, threatening you, telling others to say bad things about you. - speak out.

Basically, Ayden Jane is a great kid. She is smart and perceptive and just when you think she is clueless, you find out she wiser than you could imagine. Some day she will be able to express all the cool stuff that rolls around in there. In the mean time, I enjoy the glimpses.