Running

So I have continued to do some running. I have always run alone with my own thoughts. It has been my stress reliever, my prayer time, my solitude, my me time.... pretty much as long as I can remember. Last year I decided to run the Myrtle Beach Marathon as a fund raiser for The Foundation for Prader Willi Research. It was a huge leap because although I have always loved to run, I don't think I ever had gone more than 5 or 6 miles at a time. I was very into it. I loved the training. I think I needed the training. Well, it was cancelled due to snow and I was definitely disappointed. I just needed a finish line. I was determined to go for it again this year but something is different now. I have been doing some running and the training physically is easier, but the mental part/heart has not been in it. I was thinking about it as I was running today. I came to realize that I am just in such a different place than I was this time last year. I don't NEED to run anymore. AJ is doing great. The other 3 kids are doing awesome. Gary is starting a new job which will help us tremendously financially. I am crazy busy but the stress level has definitely dropped. Sure, we still work hard with Ayden Jane, we are busy trying to help Kayla choose a college and pay for it, we spend our weekends on soccer fields, our sofa is torn tattered and broken and there are many similar things around the house that are way past time to replace, Gary drives a van with 260,000 miles on it that we can hear 2 blocks away which is dying a slow painful death, we have more practices and games than family meal times...

BUT we are healing. I sleep at night without worrying. Mckenna is so much less fearful. Noah has grown into a fine young man, is doing great in school and making great choices, Kayla is completing a tremendous 4 years of high school as a student, athlete and friend and has a fantastic future on the horizon. Ayden Jane is, well, your basic 3 year old. A feat I was afraid to dream of when she was tiny. Gary is working at a new job which he loves and is so happy and relaxed. Our house is filled with laughter and we enjoy our crazy family. We like to hang out together and we cheer each other on. There is nothing better as a mom than to watch all your kids truly enjoy one another, support one another... love one another.

So, what about the running? I am ready. I want to do it. Yep. I WANT to do it. It is okay to run because I just want to, not because I need to. We will see how it goes since I signed up a long time ago for a half marathon this coming Sunday. YIKES! It will be okay because now my heart is in it. I will run it as a celebration. I will count my blessing for 13 miles. Wish me luck!